Where Our Love Story Began: Inspiring Love Stories that Last

Where Our Love Story Began

I first wrote this story almost 6 years ago not long after Adam asked me out.  Although I didn’t know it at the time, he had approached my family and asked for permission to marry me before he ever asked my out on a date.

Where our Love Story Began:

This is how we announced to the public that we were “going steady.”  It never looked like a traditional dating relationship, but it worked for us.  We are passionate about building love stories that last, and hope that you are inspired by ours!

In January of 2010, a young man named Adam moved to my hometown to become the youth pastor at the church I attended and worked at.  At the time, I was very excited for the gift of working with Adam to bless the youth.  However, as the year went on I discovered that God had something even bigger and better in mind. 

My life goal has always been and continues to be to ultimately bring God honor and glory in everything I do, reflecting His life and love in all my actions.  I have always been committed to living a life of purity and integrity to the best of my ability.  Part of that commitment has been lived out through intentionally not dating anyone until such a time as God saw fit to bring someone extraordinary into my life and made it very clear that person was part of God’s perfect plan for my imperfect future.

Sometime during the summer of 2010, I began to suspect that Adam might be that special someone.  However, I continued to live my life as I always have, trusting God that if it was His will, he would work it out in His timing and His way.  During this time, I focused on putting God first and followed that with a strong commitment to my family, ministry, and education.

Adam consistently supported this focus and commitment and we both chose to keep healthy boundaries as coworkers.  Little did I know at the time that God had been working in Adam’s heart throughout the summer to grow and develop a love for me that is now in full bloom in his heart.  It was late that summer that Adam began to realize and receive all that God was working in his heart.

Over the next few months, we worked together as a ministry team focused on impacting our youth group for God.  God used that focus and dedication for His glory and we both believe He touched and impacted many of the youth of this community.  In December, we both stepped away from the church due to some internal conflict.  During the process of leaving, and Adam and I no longer being coworkers, God began to work in both of our lives.  We both sought Him first, seeking His healing and His guidance for both of us as individuals.

It is often through hard times that we really learn to see the people who matter to us the most.  And it was through this hard time that God began to especially work in Adam’s heart.  During the first few weeks of January 2011, through several conversations with pastors, Adam’s family, my family, and fasting and prayer, he believed that God was directing him to communicate his feelings and intentions with me.

On January 21st, 2011, Adam and I met for breakfast at Dennys and we had “The Talk.”  From that talk, we both decided to publicly declare what God has done and is doing in our lives. We have both maintained healthy boundaries in our lives…waiting for God to move in this area of our lives and to provide the blessing of a lifelong spouse worth waiting for.  We both believe that God is pouring out this blessing to us in each other.

Adam and I both have 3 to 4 months of intense education before us (I am finishing up my Bachelor’s Degree in Biblical Studies, and he is completing Level 1 of the Berean School of Ministry), and finishing that education is a big priority, to both of us and to our families and friends.  Although we have chosen to make our commitment to each other public, we are not entering into a traditional “dating” relationship.  This means that the majority of the time we spend together is in group settings.  We are committed to keeping time alone together at a minimum and at times and in situations where maintaining physical purity is not a major challenge.

A lot of people may question this and wonder how we are going to get to know each other.  My answer: We already know each other!!  We’ve spent a full year as friends and working together in ministry.  We’ve laughed together, played together, prayed together, and cried together as friends and as ministry partners.  Through these experiences, we’ve learned a great deal about each other, how we think and how we react both in stressful situations and in times of just enjoying life and having fun.  We have discussed our values in relation to God, to ministry, and to life; we have shared frustrations and joys, disappointments and victories.  I firmly believe that the past year has been a precious gift from God to us so that we could get to know one another as friends before romantic feelings ever entered the picture.

Although the love that I have for Adam is growing deeper each day, it is not based out of shallow, worldly attraction.  It is founded in the deep appreciation I have for him as a dear friend, and out of the amazing character he has consistently displayed in all the time that I have known him.  He is a great man of God whose first and foremost concern is to live all out for his Lord.

Fast Forward to Today:

When I first wrote this, I had no idea that we would be married 8 months later.  However, after just a few months of our courtship, we realized that we didn’t want to wait any longer.  I was 26, and Adam was 30, and we recognized that we had indeed found our soul mates and there was no reason to wait.  He proposed to me the day before I officially finished my course work for my Bachelor’s Degree, and we got married 3 months later.

Now, we’ve celebrated our 5th anniversary and can truly say that God is very good!  We have a goal to create a culture around us of lasting love stories, and we truly want to be an inspiration to you.  No matter where you are in life or in love, know that God really does have a plan.  It takes a lot of trust to put the future of your love life into God’s hands, but it does pay off.

I’ll post again soon with a closer look at how and why we made the life choices we did that lead us to each other.  Please share our story if we have inspired you, and don’t hesitate to contact me if you need prayer or support in this area.  Read the Art of Purity to learn more about my personal commitment to purity.

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2 comments

    • reflectingbeautiful@gmail.com says:

      Thank you, Debra! Sharing our story is one of my passions, hoping to inspire others that lasting and beautiful love stories are still possible! Thanks for reading!

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